How Long Does It Really Take to Master the Art of Tact?

Photo by Adam Wilson on Unsplash

Some people seem born with tact. The rest of us have to earn it.

So, how long does it take?

In reality, it can vary from person to person and largely depends on their individual style, prior experiences, and dedication to improving.

I've been on my tact journey for a few weeks now, and it hasn't been easy. I've made great progress, but I realize it's a marathon and not a race.

Even though it's impossible to pinpoint an exact timeframe, we can take a look at a breakdown of the learning process.

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1) Awareness & Understanding

The first step in acquiring tact is understanding what it is, which I cover in great detail in The Art of Social Tact: The Essential Guide.

A key element to keep in mind is that tact is communicating sensitively and diplomatically, especially in delicate situations.

This includes empathy, active listening, and choosing the right words.

This stage might take some self-reflection and learning through resources like articles, books, or communication skills workshops.

2) Practice & Application

The next step in your tact learning journey is practicing with intent.

Consciously applying tactful communication in everyday interactions will strengthen your skills. Like any other skill, treat it like a muscle. The more you use it, the stronger it gets. The less you use it, the more difficult it will be to tap into tactful communication.

You'll also want to seek feedback. Asking for constructive criticism from trusted individuals will give you valuable perspective and help you hone your skills even further.

Lastly, practice and application are an ongoing process. It involves actively practicing tactful communication and gradually refining your skills. Don't think you can change overnight. You'll only wind up frustrating yourself.

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3) Habit Formation & Refinement

The final step on your learning journey is making tactful communication a natural and automatic part of your interactions.

This step may take months or even years to accomplish, depending on individual commitment and consistency. This is, of course, true for any skill.

However, three factors can influence the learning curve.

First, your level of emotional intelligence. Individuals with higher emotional intelligence might find it easier to understand and apply tact.

Second, your prior experience in diverse social settings or situations requiring diplomacy can accelerate the learning process.

Finally, your level of self-awareness--understanding your own communication style and areas for improvement can aid in learning to use tact effectively.

Quick Recap: The Journey Ahead

The three phases of the journey to acquiring tact include:

1. Awareness & Understanding

2. Practice & Application

3. Habit Formation & Refinement

In essence, learning tact is a journey of self-awareness, mindful communication, and continuous practice.

This week, try using tact in one difficult conversation—and reflect on the outcome.

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